Seize and Assist

* You only live once * Carpe Diem! * Live in the moment * Life is short * When in Rome * Now or never *

What do you think when you hear these phrases?

When standing alone, they are motivating and inspiring. But it seems they are most often uttered when someone is on the fence regarding something debaucherous, risky, or extravagant. Perhaps you’re considering bungee jumping, purchasing a designer handbag, or entering a 20-scoop ice cream eating challenge. A friend may exclaim any number of those sayings as a means to coax you into doing it. We only have this one life – may as well do it up right. Right?

I don’t know…

Over the weekend I was contemplating ordering a macaroni and cheese grilled cheese sandwich at a place known for its grilled cheese. (When in Rome!) A big hunk of baked mac n’ cheese between slices of gooey cheddar and sandwiched between grilled buttered sourdough bread – YUM! I totally wanted it in my belly. My soul, however, desperately wants to be healthy. Then I got to thinking… If life really is short, and I use that excuse to indulge, I will never be healthy. What if my life turns out to be long? I will have lived a long life never having been healthy because I was too busy living in the moment.

I ordered a Greek salad.

I understand this isn’t exactly living in the moment because I was considering my future. But I think this is where the balance comes in, and balance is precisely my point. Had I ordered that grilled cheese, I am certain it would have been delicious, but I also think I would have immediately experienced buyer’s remorse and guilt (and probably a stomachache). Same with the handbag. If purchasing it overextends your budget, you’ll have a rough couple of weeks ahead of you. I don’t think we should live in the moment at the expense of sound logic or the immediate future no matter what fun catchphrase people come up with. #YOLO anybody?

Nor should we live a life of discipline and rigidity! Perhaps had I worked out the morning I was faced with the grilled cheese I would have ordered it and felt entitled to it and enjoyed every bite and felt no regrets (just the stomachache). If you’re spending birthday or tax money, go for it – buy the bag! There are times and places for everything. The wisdom is in knowing the difference. It doesn’t hurt to give your future moment the respect of some brief consideration. Just be flexible. Seldom are things really “now or never.” Assuming I live a little longer and the very popular restaurant doesn’t go out of business, I’ll have another chance to indulge in cheesy goodness. But for now, I am pleased with my decision.

I have always been an indulgent person, disregarding future moments to live in this moment. It takes a great amount of discipline and willpower on my part to break this cycle. It often seems as though I am hardwired to seek pleasure. In the face of pleasure my other wires seem to short out. This tendency to indulge has lead to a lot of suffering by way of guilt, regret, and shame.

These cliche sayings are often abused; used to pressure people into doing things they know they probably shouldn’t, or used as excuses to behave in certain ways. Yeah, life is short, but I am willing to bet you can do without trying cocaine or streaking through a police station. ‘Live in the moment’ is not free license to throw all judgement out the window or act like an asshole.

Live in the moment

Use these phrases to positively motivate you instead. What do you really want to do? Allow yourself to be inspired to take action the way a friend might coax you into cliff jumping or to finally ask that nice guy who has been flirting with you out on a date. Start your novel, travel to Tahiti, bake a souffle… these things will not be regretted (assuming you can afford Tahiti. If you can’t, save!). Imagine your closest friend urging you on… imagine them saying “Life is short! Do it!!” 

We often indulge in things at the expense of the next moment. Lets not do this. Taking no action, however, also robs the very next moment of progress. Instead of one step forward, you’re still at the starting line. So live life in the moment, but do consider your immediate future.

What do you think?